Well. Nothing homophobic about that.

No siree.

Cory says: "About half the people I call regularly miss most of their calls because they don't hear or feel the ringer."

Actually, Cory -- and I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this -- they're avoiding you.

Next: scientific papers.

The research is paid for by your taxes. The papers are published in journals -- often run by the most profitable scientific publishing arms of their publishing houses -- where the authors pay to have them published ($125 per page is typical, with a typical length of 6-10 pages).

And yet, many journals persist in keeping those papers permanently behind locked doors, inaccessible to the public.

According to the Port of Oakland website:

Four restroom entrances in the new Terminal 2 concourse boast wall reliefs by Emeryville artist Robert Ortbal. Borrowing their collective title from the Beatles' lyric I am you, he is she, we are all together, two of the four installations feature fig leaf patterns, and two use the artist's fingerprints - produced using a combination of limestone, plaster, mirrors and glass.

Magnified to the point of abstraction and highly reflective, these images are experienced differently, depending on the viewer's proximity to the walls.

Both of these artworks are made possible under the Port of Oakland's Public Art Ordinance which makes public art a requirement for all major construction projects. A total of $1.2 million is earmarked for the public art component of OAK's Terminal Improvement Program.

The Port of Oakland paid $60,000 for the four works according to recent minutes: Here is his proposal, as it appeared in those minutes, in its entirety:

Robert Ortbal
Privacy Walls Proposal for the Oakland International Airport

I am you, he is she, we are all together.

I have chosen this familiar line from a Beatle's song as the title for my proposed installation for the four privacy walls to help expose the delightfully paradoxical nature of this site for a public art commission, and to provide an additional point of access to the art work for the millions of passengers visiting Oakland International each year. As the title suggests, the connections between all of us run deep. It is these connections that I plan to reveal by carving the structural patterns of selected species into large plaster slabs.

I propose to make four works that explore the connection between the three broadest divisions of the natural world – plant, animal and mineral. Two of the works will feature the venation patterns of fig leaves (plant kingdom) and two will use my fingerprints(animal kingdom). I will transform these unique patterns into works of art using a combination of domestic materials-- a limestone plaster, mirrors and glass – which invoke the mineral kingdom, as well as elements in our day-to-day environment that are often overlooked.

The - Iam you, he is she – part of the title will be tangibly experienced by passengers as they approach and see themselves reflected in the pattern of my fingerprint . The divide between male and female will be suspended as a woman may, for a moment, contemplate how she could ever be me. Reproducing my fingerprints in mirror not only serves as an emblem for the animal kingdom but also reinforces the vanity and egotistical tendencies of our species and sets in motion the realization of the deeper and more fundamental connections we share with the other kingdoms.

After passengers have experienced their own existence in the mirror, and come closer to the work, they may see the space between the reflective mirrored surfaces of the fingerprint and leaf venation patterns as an aerial view of the canyons and valleys of some distant land -- a land many passengers will cross as they travel into or out of Oakland.

As passengers continue to their gate walking past additional restrooms, they will see a three-by-five foot leaf in front of the men's room . Many will recognize the pattern as a fig leaf, and perhaps recall the biblical reference of Adam and Eve's fall from grace or the Victorian practice of placing a carved plaster fig leaf over the private parts of classical masterpieces. Perhaps too, their minds may flash back for an instant to the title or hear the Beatle's song .. .we are all together. This leaf, those mountains, and the artist -- they are all parts of the bigger picture we call home, the universe -- both real and imagined.

You know what I hate about the illegal spying AT&T and the other telecoms are doing?

It's that they can keep all that information, and much more, and if anyone should sue to learn about it, or stop it, they have "national security" protection. And they can then use that information for their commercial purposes.

Example: my brother got a phone call from Comcast trying to get him to use their VOIP (this, when Vonage was on the ropes, which he uses). It was clear they knew he used Vonage ("You use Vonage? What are you going to do when they go bankrupt?"). And so it is clear they're recording all the websites he visits, and all the packets his computer sends.

My brother tells me that, the day after the Sprint patent decision after Vonage (which he uses), Comcast called him to offer VOIP service. When he declined, they became aggressive: "Are you getting a cheaper service? Are you using Vonage? They're going to go out of business, and what are you going to do then?" Clearly, they'd been tracking that my brother uses Vonage.

Here's what's going on: Comcast is databasing all the infomration -- IPs, ports, and the contents of the packets themselves -- and treating them as if they were their property.

It's as if the phone company were listening to your calls, and who you called, and using what you said and who you talked to as part of their business plan. "Woah! No more calls in from that subversive Xeni Jardin! She undermines our business plan."