So it appears that for the next few years all hops are owned by people who don't think Natural Ice is that bad. But there is another way..

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gruit

Pre-hops herbal beer. It even comes with it's own conspiracy theory:

"Some authors (notably Stephen Harrod Buhner in his book "Sacred and herbal healing beers") have been tempted to oversimplify this and present the switch to hops as a Protestant crackdown on feisty Catholic tradition, and as a Puritan move to try and keep people from enjoying themselves with aphrodisiac and stimulating gruit ales by imposing the sedative effects of hops instead."

This is mildly amusing in a "The Brothers Grunt" way but fake. There is no reason to debate or dwell for more than 5 seconds.

It'd be funnier if it was less obviously fake.

Next time..

Maybe set the click-bots to be less ambitious. Keep the main page to homosexuality ratio to the 1:60 or so you see with Deathly Hallows. Then toss in Leo Strauss or Roy Campbell for less obvious fun before closing out with Gay Bowel Syndrome.