#6:

Actually, he fully qualifies, children or no.

From the rules:

"Since a qualifier for DA candidacy is that the applicant "remove himself (gender inclusive) from the gene pool, it follows logically that once one is removed from the gene pool, one will not reproduce further. This subsequent lack of reproduction is an after-effect of the qualifying event. Therefore nominees with offspring still qualify by virtue of the fact that they will not contribute further." -- Cardinal Fang

Noen,

Darwin awards

Wow! Ambulatory jazz-age snowman!

I think #9 is right. This was published with a knowing wink.

One of the subheads: "Different Strokes".

Caption for the picture near the end: "Wytham Woods are home to about 400 breeding pairs of great tits."

Ah, 400 breeding pairs of great tits. That's a cozy image.

@Jordan M, #44:
"Hell the Catholic church hands out alcohol every Sunday. Granted it is a very small amount. Maybe they should be locked up for child abuse."

Yeah. THAT'S why they should be locked up for child abuse.

Somebody needs to drop that thing into a vat of molten steel. Now. Before it's too late.

Under all speech that is good for anything there lies a silence that is better. Silence is deep as Eternity; speech is shallow as Time.
-- Thomas Carlyle

"What's funnier than a gorilla chasing bananas through a school? Nothing," said Andrew Leinonen, the prank's mastermind and the student who dressed as a gorilla.

For that quote alone, they should get a booking on Letterman.

FREE THE ZION ELEVEN!!

Makes you wonder if Microsoft, the whole complex corporate entity itself, has somehow become self-aware and just gets it's jollies by manipulating humans into acting like absolute fools.

OK, how do we expel Florida from the Union?

It's a peninsula, so the new border would be easy to defend. Lots of coastline, so the navy can lob in the shells when necessary.

Isn't it time?

So, the Lord Jesus has been busy working on OS X.

That explains both how it got to be so awesome an OS and the increase in suffering in the world in recent years.

Quite the tradeoff.

They've cloned Maggie Simpson!

And good god, "Two by two, hands of blue". This can't be good.

Hey, Boo.