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• Commented on Galileo's fingers found
  I wonder how many penises of famous people are sitting in the basements of museums. Come to think of it, how documented is this process of removing bits and ends? How does one authenticate the eBay "Hitler's penis Item #...
• Commented on Animated map of US unemployment stats since 2007 (spoiler: we're fading to black)
  This would be much cooler if the colours represented ratios of zombie to non-zombie populations....
• Commented on Science Jokes to Brighten Your Monday Morning
  In an alternate reality, this is considered funny stuff....
• Commented on Maricopa deputy steals defender's paperwork during a court case
  I just want it to be clear, I also wasn't the prosecuting attorney during the main part of this trial, they just got me from a temp agency, and I don't want my name associated with this soon-to-be Federal Supreme...
• Commented on USB grenade flash drive
  I had one of these explode in my pocket, there were bits everywhere....
• Commented on Alternate Star Trek pilot to be released
  If you closed your eyes and listened,it sure sounded like Star Trek TOS. And I loved the intro, heading off into the unknown blackness of space. Man, the visual effects on TOS were horrible, I never saw one convincing space...
• Commented on McDonald's Gitmo is hiring!
  I'm bother that the inmates can get a Big Mac, but not a fair trial....
• Commented on Animal with the longest penis (relative to its size!)
  That guy in Trading Places locked up in the cage with the gorilla.... Eyes don't pop out like that from no 3cm poke....
• Commented on MJ's funeral cost a mil
  Being aroused at a funeral makes me feel so dirty....
• Commented on Solar sails to take flight
  I wonder how many of these will be Christened "Falcon" ......
• Commented on Animal with the longest penis (relative to its size!)
  I wish I could do this at a movie theater....
• Commented on Mash-up video culled from 99 classic albums
  The greatest concert never held....
• Commented on Electric chair haunted house prop
  Needed some flashing LED's in the eye sockets to really sell it. The lethal injection version of this is really boring....
• Commented on The $147.72 "audio grade" power socket
  Manitoba Hydro is building a new generating station along the Putzwater River up north. The river is fed by melting glaciers, water so pure Jesus himself would leave a ring around the tub. A swath 1200 kilometers long is being...
• Commented on Man finds "missile launcher" in his back-40
  Except it was probably fired SOMEWHERE withing the United States by persons unknown. That should bother some folks....
• Commented on No cross-dressing at Morehouse College
  What do the five cross dressing gays have to say about this?...
• Commented on Dead guy on balcony 4 days, neighbors mistook for "Halloween dummy"
  No, but the neighbors are deaf....
• Commented on Best microscopic photos of the past 35 years
  I'm having a very Pink Floyd moment here. 1984 & 1985 are album covers, I'm sure of it!...
• Commented on Boy missing after experimental balloon crash lands
  They DID call the TV stations directly. This was mentioned as it was all happening, that the family feared the boy was in the air, and could you send your news choppers to find him.. btw, we need to phone...
• Commented on Boy missing after experimental balloon crash lands
  I knew this was BS when I saw 'Golden Palace' on the balloon. I got a sense there's a new 'Jon & Kate' type series being planned around this family. This week: Falcon gets carried aloft on a balloon!!...
• Commented on Stunningly strange cloud
  District Niet....
• Commented on Olympic Committee Member to Chicago bid team: US Customs is "harrowing experience"
  It takes corruption to defeat corruption....
• Commented on @BBVBOX: recent guest-tweeted web video picks (boingboingvideo.com)
  Taliban, are you watching this? This man will do mortal harm to Obama in exchange for a good chewing tobacco....
• Commented on 1987 dating video
  I enjoy hunting wolverines with my uncle in Alaska....
• Commented on Dead cell-phones: suspense movie cop-outs
  Well thanks, now I'm super paranoid that when MY phone has no signal, I'll be chopped up, hunted down, burned alive, tortured, run over, abducted and otherwise face death. I needed a scene.. dark.... tight face shot.. girl is holding...
• Commented on Daily photos of a healthy cervix for one month
  Day Twelve Cervical fluid white and wet, milky Feeling particularly sexual --- Look hard enough, and you'll see the Millennium Falcon in there....
• Commented on Amazing video of girl barely missing an out-of-control car
  Matt L. - Drink much? I've never backed into one of those poles. Not in 20 years behind the wheel....
• Commented on Gadgets used in Garrido property investigation: "ground-penetrating radar," magnetometers
  http://www.pbs.org/opb/timeteam/about/watters.php Meg worked on UK and US versions of this program concept....
• Commented on Light show caused by astronaut urine
  They should bottle that stuff and sell it! If old Chinese buy bear bladders for boners, then computer geeks would chug space piss....
• Commented on Mad Parisian mayors fight each other with road signs
  They sure give Mayors a lot of power over there !! Isn't there an council these ideas have to go through, then the traffic department would consult with the State traffic services.... and you gotta use certified traffic engineers to...